another bite of that humble pie, thank you very much

actually this morning I was in the middle of writing a job well done post about how proud I was of my children. Miles was being super sassy to Jay and I asked Miles "What does the bible say about treating others?" He answered, "Be Kind, to eachother!" Ahh! Thats so great! He's really getting it, and not even 2 yet!! (This is the bible verse book that we use. This kids love it, and can look at the pictures and say the bible verse, well not all of them...but you get the picture!)

Then in our bible story we were reading about Saul/Paul and meeting Jesus on the road to Damascus, in the boys' storybook Bible. Paul said something like "who are you" to Jesus, and Jay shouted out "Jesus is the Savior." WOW! I was just blown away! (and by the way to any mom looking for a great bible for their kids, this is the best, its not only great for the kids, but honestly, I love reading it too:)

So again, I was writing this this morning, such joy and pride in my heart about how much they were learning and how it was sinking in! In the mean time the boys were upstairs saying good morning to mom and she came down, Miles in tears and Jay sulking. Apparently Miles was fighting with Jay over a toy, screaming and crying, and Jay was talking back to Noni and being disrespectful.
So yes, I will have another bite of that pie please.

WIPs

I am what you call a naptime/bedtime crafter. When the boys are asleep, I try out new projects. Most of the things I have been sewing or knitting or re/upcycling clothes (click on the Made! option underneath the title of my blog, you'll see some of my creations).... BUT since we are moving into a house on Sept 3rd (WAHOO! yes you can all shout it!) I have been working on new things for the house that I wanted to share with you!

Wanted to share this (its for me, not the house, but hey, whatev)
I love this vest and the olive green color! Cant wait to finish!
Its such a boring knit though, so its taking me a while!

picture frames from goodwill. I plan to paint them both.
Not sure whether I will frame a picture, or some type of object?!

I got these corbels off craigslist for $10! I plan on painting the gold and the green on them and using them  as a holder for a huge beam that Davon is "aging," by beating it like a rented mule:)

This is the blue paint I am going to use on the boys' chest of drawers that we bought from good will (scroll down you'll see it)

Davon and I found this at a salvage yard. I plan on staining it and writing some sort of phrase or saying on the glass for the dining area.

This is the chest of drawers for the boys' room. I am sanding it, painting it that dark blue and bought steel knobs for it. Its gonna look great!

A cute tablecloth from Target is going to become my curtains for the playroom/my craftroom!

I loved the shower hooks, they will become the hangers for the curtains!

This is actually not a wip, its my moms old sewing machine that I have been using, but......

She bought me a new one for my birthday! Yay Mom! So.....

Davon is making me a table long enough to do all my sewing and projects, but skinny enough that it doesnt take up too much room in our new little house!

siblings.....

the hardest part about having two kids is the constant arguing over a toy? Oh your kids never do it? Congrats. My kids, all the time. Who had which toy first? Who hit who first? Why is Miles saying no? Why is Jayson crying? Why are you both yelling 'mine'? Do you both need to go in time out? Do you both want your bottom spanked? you get the picture. I have felt very convicted to speak into their hearts about these matters. Not just discipline with justice, ie: "Well, who had the toy first?" or "Who hit who" instead, why did you hit Jayson or why is it more important for you to have the toy? Although they both are young I think its so important to start explaining to them that they are sinners, in need of a savior. Before you read this and say, wow Tara has gotten super "churchy." I dont straight use those words with them. I ask them if they feel like their happiness is more important than there brother's, and then we talk about why that is wrong and that Jesus tells us to love one another as much as ourselves and to be kind to eachother. I'm pretty sure we say this scripture ever single day and more than a few times a day. But I want them to start understanding that we live in a fallen world and they need their hearts to be restored, and that even constantly trying to rip a toy of of anothers hand is sinful. Day in and day out I get pretty drained, and if you are a mother with children this close in age and say you don't I think you would be either lieing or crazy. But just when I feel like I am at the end of my rope and my hair will be ripped out before it has the chance to go gray, I get such wonderful glimpses of love out of both of them....
Miles loves Jay, adores him and (when hes in the mood) shares with him in such a precious way. He isnt at the age yet that wants praise for the sharing, it just comes to him and he loves to see the smile on Jays face. He says "here Jayson here." (If you know Miles well, this is how he talks, love you mommy love you, or hi meg hi, or hold you daddy hold you, always repeats the same words twice). I love how they, when they think no one is watching, play so nicely together. Jay will pull down candyland or shoots and ladders and they will name colors or numbers, or they will play with their trains. Jay makes a huge track for Miles to push his train around. Just today I snuck in to find them sitting on the couch, book opened up and Jay "reading" it to Miles, Miles then sees me and says "Momma, Jay readin it, book." Or shopping at a huge antique market today, Jay pushing Miles in the stroller pointing out things to him and Jay saying, "Miles, arent you so excited about it?" How can that not just bring a smile to your face?
I often think, and believe me I know this is so small compared to God, but that God's love is a lot like mine. Its constant training, discipline, molding, shaping, pointing out things that I need to work on, cleaning up my junk, showing me how selfish I really am, but in the same exact moment loving me with all His heart. Smiling at me in the quiet moments, being so proud of the person that I am, the person that He has created, loving me nonstop, even when I don't deserve it. I wish in so many ways that people would grasp this. That God loved us, Christ loved us when we were still sinners. That we were totally deprived, that we didnt have God steering us in the right direction, that we were destined for failure, and God restored us. Made us whole again....in no way could we do anything to earn His love and still He loved us just the same. I think being a parent helps you to understand the love of God, and I'm pretty sure thats why he gave us the blessing of parenthood. For His Glory.

So sweet.

grandparents canvas

Blank Project Canvas Print

Send custom cards from Shutterfly for St. Patrick's Day.

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roller coaster woman

I dont know if its just me, or if its all the hormones that women have, or if its just everything that is going on in life right now, but I feel like I am on a roller coaster, and poor Davon and the boys are strapped in behind me. Thats a perk about being a man I think, if they are ever emotional they can go and deal with it on their own, but we women, especially moms have so many things pulling you in different directions. These past few days have been so up and down for me! With the loss of my grandpa it has been hard to grieve. Jay, for some reason, has been fascinated with the idea of dieing. So of course as any person who loves the Lord and their child and wants him to come to know Jesus I shared with him what happens when we die and go to heaven. The first time it made me smile, even with the sadness of grandpa's passing I still was happy to use this moment as a teachable time for Jay. The second time was a good reminder conversation, the third time was a little draining, then on and on and on he kept talking about dieing, going to see Jesus, about how grandpa got there. Finally, and this time it was in the car, I had to pull over and started bawling. Poor Jay, he had no idea this was coming, he sat there stunned. Luckily we were close to church and Davon met us and had a talk with him instructing him to not talk about death anymore. ....deep breath....I love my children, but how do you deal with such raw emotion in front of these little faces? I feel like lately, I have been crying, yelling, or just being quiet before them. I know they are wondering where their mom is, where is the joy? Death is such a hard thing. Yes we can be joyful because we know that heaven is there, and eternity with the Lord is far better than we can ever imagine here on earth. BUT, death is also our greatest enemy. The Lord hates death! The only 3 times that Jesus ever wept in the bible was about death. So I am joyful that Grandpa is with the Lord, and yet I am so mad that death is even a factor here on earth, because of our stupid sin. So I am human, dealing with real emotion, and yet having to be example to children on how to deal with things the right way, the godly way. Sometimes thats exhausting. But sometimes God puts a smile on my face and shows me that He has blessed me, and my kids, though young, do understand and they can still have fun and still be resilient to what the world, or even mommy, throws at them. Thank you Lord for that!

.

This is them on my worst day of yelling and crying. Now how can you not smile at that:)

July 31, 2011

 In the history of the date July 31 lots of things went down. History was made on battlefronts, islands were being discovered, records were being set, people were being born, and lives were being lost.
30 BC - Battle of Alexandria: Mark Antony achieves a minor victory over Octavian's forces, but most of his army subsequently deserts, leading to his suicide.
1396 - William Courtenay, Archbishop of Canterbury (b. 1342)
1498 - Christopher Columbus discovers island of Trinidad
1875 - Andrew Johnson, 17th pres, dies in Tennessee at 66
1997 - Ulrich Ernst Simon, theologian, dies at 63
1910 - Chic Cub King Cole no-hits St Louis, 4-0 in a 7 inning game


Today, for our family marks a day that we have lost one of the worlds greatest men, in our hearts. Frank John Krezel Sr was one of a kind. As I think back of fond memories of my grandpa I can't help but have joy in my heart in the midst of such sadness. I remember playing in his backyard while he sat on his cubs lawn chair listening to the only am radio station that broadcasted polka music. I remember him playing his accordian and all of us dancing around. I remember his wheaties and warm milk for breakfast. How he used to buy boxed ice cream and transfer it to a tupperware. How he would always make sure that we would have a family reunion with all the Krezels and at that the reunions ALWAYS video record it. He would get in your face while you were eating or chatting and say really loudly "HOW YA DOIN?" I remember playing yahtzee on saturday nights eating pizza and he would yell really loud "YAHTZEE" every time he shook the dice. I remember the scruff on his face and how he would constantly torture the grandkids with it by rubbing his face all over ours. I remember going to mass on sunday morning and he would be the only man wearing a light up bow tie to church! With that same bow tie he came from Arizona to Georgia for my high school graduation and shouted out "GO CUBS" when I walked across the stage to get my diploma. I remember the love that he and grandma had for eachother, the bedtime kiss ritual of "Goodnight"-kiss-"Sleep tight"-kiss-"Sweet Dreams"-kiss-"I Love You"-kiss, and how even as a child I thought it was sweet that they almost has a song the sang to eachother ever night. Grandpa was a man that was deeply in love with his family, his children, his grandchildren, and his cubbies! It was hard to be around him and not feel joyful about life. He is probably the only 80 year old man that if you google him you will find him on facebook and twitter! He loved working on the computer and learning new things. He always tried to capture every moment with a camera or video. I choose to believe this is where I learned my love for capturing wonderful moments. So to the man that lived life to the fullest, taught us how to be a family, how to take care of family, how to love your family, to remember to keep in touch whatever the cost whatever it takes, Grandpa we will see you in heaven. I hope that when you entered heaven you and Jesus were able to rejoice together at what a wonderful life you lived. With tears pouring out as I write, I am so thankful to the Lord that I was blessed to be a part of such a beautiful life. I love you grandpa.

An update...

There has been so much going on here lately. Some really hard life stuff and some wonderful things.
The Hard:
-Change to a new city for me has been really difficult. I never new how many wonderful friends I had until I moved away. At the same time I never realized how many people that I would lose in my life moving just 3 and a half hours away and  how difficult it would be to make new friends.
-There have been many changes at Davon's job and ministry and it has not been what we had envisioned it being. (But we make our own plans, and God does too:)
-We had planned on living in my parents basement for 3 months and last week in marked a full year that we have been living here, and it doesnt seem that we are getting out any time soon.
-I have not been able to do much ministry because I have two youngins and we live so far from the church.
-I have seen lots of my friends and family and people around me hurting, and there is not a lot of happiness surrounding me.
-My only grandfather had a stroke at the beginning of this month and has not been well, found out today that he only has a few days at most. He is the only grandfather I have every known, growing up I spent every other weekend at he and grandmas. He made us laugh, took care of us, taught us how to be passionate about things, and showed us the comfort of knowing your spouse and after 60+ years lovin her still the same.
I of course am leaving out a lot of details, but its important to me that i not focus on the bad because there is a lot of good!
The Good:
-Davon has a flexible schedule and although some days he can work for 14 hours straight, some days he can go into work late and I wake up to two little boys screaming and laughing and chasing daddy around the house.
-The ability to continue to be a stay at home mom. Finances are still very tight, but enough that I can stay home and play all day:)
-My relationship with the Lord is strengthening, I am hearing more from Him daily and growing with Him. I am reading more, praying more, learning more than ever. Lack of friendships has been hard, but Jesus has been my sustainer and I see the light at the end of the tunnel now:)!
-My kiddos! They are more wonderful then ever. They stretch me, but encourage me every day. From Jay's "Can I tell you a secret Mommy, You are the most beautiful, best Mommy in the whole world, even the city" (Not sure where he got the idea that a city is bigger than the world, but its so cute to me:) to Miles sassy attitude. Daily conversations with Miles go something like this...Me in a firm tone: Miles what is going on? Miles: "Saying NO to him, Jayson, hit his face." Meaning, basically, he was saying no to Jay and Jay wouldnt stop, so he hit him in the face. ....So great. Needless to say I am reading two parenting books now and trying to figure out how to raise this little fireball. He now completes my sentences Me: "Miles, I will..." Miles: "SPANK A BOTTOM" and then he laughs and laughs:) Oh Lord, help me!